Dear Bwitch!

27 01 2010

My underwire bras always poke me. How come?
Savitri

As a bra gets larger in the band size, the distance between the cups also increases. Underwires are placed in a bra according to accurate measurements. If you experience poking, your bra is probably the wrong band size. It is important that you measure for your band size and then not deviate from it when purchasing bras.

What features should I look for in a maternity bra?
Radhika

A comfortable maternity bra should have wide side bands and shoulder straps to support growing breast tissue. Shoulder straps should have some cushioning and not stretch. Look for a bra with three or more back closures to offer the most flexibility in fit. The bra’s band should lie under the breasts and on the rib cage — not creeping up on the breast tissue. Also, if you’re pregnant during hot summer months, or you find yourself getting hot easily, look into bras made from 100% cotton. And remember, you will be wearing these bras for several months after your baby is born, so it is wise to buy a good bra that will adjust with your changing sizes.

Why are the bottom of my breasts often red or bruised?
Tina

When the band of your bra is not up against the ribcage, but rather resting on the under-breast tissue, redness and bruising can occur. The problem is that the band size of your bra is too big (e.g. you’re wearing a size 42 instead of a size 40). Your breasts are falling out from the bottom of your bra and your bra straps are being asked to bear too much of the weight and support. Not only are you uncomfortable, but your bustline is not getting proper support. Try a bra with a smaller band size and a larger cup size (e.g. try a 42D if you were wearing a 44C).

What are some general tips on drying lingerie?
Kirti

When possible, only line-dry lingerie. This will increase its life considerably.

  • If you do put lingerie items into the dryer, first lightly shake out the items, or untwist them before placing them in the dryer. This will allow even drying and reduce wrinkling.
  • Don’t overload the dryer. A stuffed dryer will not allow the items to tumble. Drying will be slower and clothes will wrinkle.
  • All clothing should be left in the dryer just long enough to remove wrinkles and moisture. Any longer, and the heat can actually set wrinkles, increase static cling and cause shrinkage. This can be true for natural and man-made fibers.
  • Acrylic, nylon, polyester, and microfibers have low moisture absorbency so are fast drying and should be dried using a low temperature setting.
  • Once you remove your items from the dryer, immediately hang or fold them. Clothes left in a heap will wrinkle.




Lingerie shopping made easy & ‘sexy’

27 12 2009
A sexy set of lingerie might appear to be the most intimate gift for your girl, but buying it or rather buying the right kind of lingerie can be quite a daunting task.

Particularly, if you wish to increase your intimacy with her, a wrong choice can do more harm than good. After all, nothing can be as embarrassing for a girl than getting a sexy corset in a size that’s way too small, or big, for her.

So, if you want to avoid the untimely death of your relationship, better brush up your style sense before going lingerie shopping for your girl. We bring you a few quick tips:

Size and style rule the roost: The first step to avoid making a blooper is to know her actual size and her taste. While buying a smaller size may cause her embarrassment, buying a larger size can give her an indication that you think she is bigger than what she actually is. So, it is always better to do a little homework beforehand. Check out her lingerie drawers and examine the labels where her size too will be mentioned.

Similarly, having an idea about her style sense will be a big help. Buying a bold black corset may be a wrong choice for a girl who loves flowery lacey stuff. A bad choice can only make her cringe, so observe what she loves to flaunt when you get into some steamy action. If you manage to get even a little close to what she loves, know that you have hit the jackpot. After all, finding her something she loves to flaunt is the greatest achievement for a man. So, let the time be your guide!

Shop for her body type

If she is tall and slim: Garter belts cut the body horizontally and make your leggy lass appear all the more sexy. These belts accentuate the legs and highlight the curves in her body. These belts form the basics of sexy lingerie and stand a rare chance of going wrong. Just make sure you buy complementing stockings, underwear and a bra to complete the set.

If she is voluptuous and well-endowed: Nothing works better to turn a big bust line into a sexy cleavage than a corset. Not just that, it also takes attention away from her fuller tummy by giving it a flattening effect together with highlighting the waistline.

If she is bigger and fulsome: If you think a tight fitting corset or bra will squeeze your fulsome babe into a lesser size, you are heading into trouble. Rather than making her realise she is big, give her something that not only makes her feel comfy, but covers her rounds in the best possible way. A sexy negligee will do the best to hide all the sins. Something like a baby doll that‘s fitted at the bust and flairs down, her bum will not only accentuate her cleavage but will also camouflage her big bottom. Go for dark colours as they have a slimming effect; nets and see-through fabrics are absolute no-no’s.

If she is fit and athletic: Wanna make your tomboyish girl look sexy for a change? Boy shorts in a sexier style are what you must buy. Not only will they make her athel etic bod look curvier, they will also accentuate her well toned butt. Anything from a bra to a corset complements a boy short well. So go ahead and let your sporty babe pose sexy tonight.

If she is shy: Not everyone is blessed with a girl who is confident enough of her body and doesn’t mind sporting even the most daring of lingerie styles. If your girl is not very comfortable flaunting that tiny-miny underwear that you bought for her, just ease her by adding a satin robe. The robe will take away her hesitation and the satiny effect against her body will make her feel sexy and sensual. And you never know what else it does to her mind and you might just get lucky!

Points to ponder

  • Make sure what you buy doesn’t accentuate or clings to a body part that she prefers to hide. For example a big tummy or thighs…you know your girl so better pick up something that flows down those areas making her look curvy.
  • Your aim should be to gift something that enhances her best assets.
  • Darker colours have a slimming look.
  • When it comes to fabric, cotton is a big no, as women prefer it for everyday use and as a gift option, looks boring.
  • Lace, silk and satin are the safest bets. They look sensuous and feel beautiful on the skin too.
  • Go for lycra only if either your girl has a ten-on-ten figure or doesn’t mind showing off those buldges. The fabric has a tendency to cling to the body.
  • Same goes for nets and see-through fabrics. Buy only if she is comfy carrying them.

Make the sales woman your friend for a day, tell her your choice and let her help you find the best piece for your princess.





Dear Bwitch!

27 12 2009
Q. I would love to know why all washing detergents turn my new nylon lingerie gray. No matter what water temperature I wash in, the results are the same. Store brand detergents seem to be worse than name brands, but I’m spending a fortune trying to have nice lingerie. Can anyone tell me a detergent/soap that will keep my whites white and colors original?
Archana
A.  First, washing and drying lingerie in machines is a definite no-no. Wash it by hand, with a mild detergent, and dry it the old-fashioned way. This will increase the life of your lingerie considerably. Stores sell a detergent designed for delicate fabrics. It’s pricey— but you may find it’s worth the investment.

Wash whites, darks and medium colors separately. Separate man-made fibers (such as nylon) from natural fibers (such as cotton). Avoid hot water. Soak lingerie for about three minutes and agitate gently rather than rubbing fabrics together. Never twist or wring lingerie. Drip-dry delicates.




Gifting lingerie: how to avoid a late-gift disaster

27 12 2009
God bless lingerie, every man’s trump card when he wakes up, hungover from the office party, to confront the hideous realisation that he hasn’t yet bought his girlfriend a Christmas present.
Help! How could this have happened? And would a medicinal nip of whisky be out of the question at 8am? There was that ring she mentioned from that shop in Mayfair but he can’t remember whether she wanted it in silver or gold. And there were those shoes she wanted from Mulberry but were they called Kitty, Pretty or Titty? Nope: far easier to buy her a bra and pants.
Her bra size? Quite a handful. Probably an E cup. Best rifle through her lingerie drawer and check. 32D? Blimey, is she really that flat-chested Actually, dear boy, the 32 pertains to her back size: don’t make the common mistake of buying a 36, as it’s the letter that determines cup size, not the number. You’d be amazed how many fully sentient grown women don’t even know that fact, but it’s an essential one.
Some other tips: don’t make the mistake of rushing out and buying red. Too Mrs Claus, and too predictable. David Beckham might shop in Agent Provocateur but then his wife is the size of a toothpick, with a body deemed fit enough to be emblazoned across Armani billboards. Lovely store and all that but perhaps not for the shy and retiring girl.
Have you considered white? I know, I know: it’s not as racy, but lingerie can often be viewed by the recipient as a selfish present, particularly if it’s of the crotchless variety. Buy her something white and she’ll be convinced your intentions are honourable. “Heavens!” she’ll cry, her heart racing as she tears apart the pale pink tissue paper. “Underwear that doesn’t make me look like a page three girl! Underwear bought for me and not for you! You really are a metrosexual man!”
Strange as it may seem, you may be on to more of a promise with a white bra than you would be with a peekaboo one in black lace. Women are funny creatures, and never forget it.
For the same reasons, anything with floral sprigs, polka dots or stripes should also go down well, particularly in muted, tasteful colours such as pale pink, navy or grey. And if a bra and pants set feels too clichéd, remember: this is the season of the Body, so feel free to buy her a sexy all-in-one. Silk camisoles and camiknickers should also be a welcome gift, the former cleverly avoiding the vexatious question of her cup size. When in doubt, always buy smaller in the bra department and bigger in the pants department: underestimating her boob size is far less offensive than thinking they are bigger than they are.
The easiest of course, would be to head to http://www.bwitch.in and beat the crowd to take care of all your lingerie shopping needs.




Dear Bwitch!

27 12 2009
Dear Bwitch,
With the holidays and all, I want to buy some lingerie for my new girlfriend but I don’t want to embarrass her. Have you got any advice? I’m sure there are many men who find themselves wanting to buy underwear for the special women in their life but don’t know where to start.
Dazed n Confused
Dear Dazed n Confused,
First of all, make sure you know her size. Sneak a peek in her underwear drawer to get it right. If you guess, you’ll probably get it wrong which can be embarrassing, particularly if you have a body-conscious girlfriend.
You could drop by at our stores at the following locations:
M-7, Greater Kailash 1,
M Block Market, New Delhi
011- 46548173

Upper Ground Floor
DLF Promenade Mall
Vasant Kunj, New Delhi
Ph: 011-46658615, 46658161

Upper Ground Floor
DLF Place, A-4 DDA District Centre
Saket, New Delhi
Ph: 011-46658617, 46658618

or alternatively point your mouse at http://www.bwitch.in and go through our selection.




Spice up your holidays: A guy’s guide to shopping for lingerie gifts

15 12 2009

Attention all fellers: As they now stand, your plans to buy a gift of frilly lingerie for your significant other are doomed to flop and fail. You’re probably looking at lingerie Web sites right now, armed only with a vague idea of your sweetheart’s sizes (no, no, stop looking at your cupped hands), and an even more vague notion of what she’d actually like to wear, a notion that’s inextricably rooted in the kind of lingerie you want to see in the bedroom: lacy, see-through, possibly evaporating.

Do some reconnaissance. Take a peek inside your significant other’s underwear or lingerie drawer and look up her bra size, which is a number followed by a letter. Then look at the panty size, which should be small, medium or large.  Do not try to measure her yourself: “A man coming at you with a measuring tape is a little frightening,” Kirti says. “Asking her for her sizes is completely fine.” Kirti also advises looking up your girl’s clothing size (size 6, size 8 and so on), which can be used to size her up for sleepwear.
You should also attempt to discern your lover’s tastes, because you’re probably less certain than you think you are. “Most guys like see-through, black, jewel tones … like the stuff they see in French movies,” says Kirti. (I know that she said “French movies” instead of “dumb American pornography,” but c’mon, fellas.) “Men typically like things that are on the racier side — which is not to say ‘slutty’ — and women want something that’s going to make them feel hot and sexy, because for women it’s very cerebral; it’s all about how we’re feeling.
“You should take her physical attributes into account,” she continues. “Find out what she finds most attractive about herself, and exploit that. If [she’s] a pear-shape, with bigger hips and booty and a really stellar upper body, buy her a bra-and-panty set so she shows off her stomach. If she’s got a tummy or has had some kids, then a baby-doll or something to cover your tummy is better. That’ll show off her legs.”
And whatever you do, don’t guess at the size. “The most common mistake men make is buying too small. It’s rare that I have women bringing back large underwear to buy small,” Kirti says. “It’s more likely they’ll bring back a small to exchange for a large.”
Make sure you’re sure. “If you’re giving lingerie for the first time, it’s really important that you go a little bit on the safer side, and buy something a little more mild,” says Kirti. “Just buy a nice silk nightgown instead of a bra-and-panty set. You can work into the sexier, racy stuff later.”
Conversely, if you’re buying for a lingerie connoisseur, don’t cheap out. “Buy the good stuff,” Kirti says. “She knows what it is, and you don’t want to insult her by buying her trashy adult-store lingerie. Not that there’s not a place for that stuff; there absolutely is. But don’t buy it for someone who loves lingerie and has a collection.”
The best lingerie gifts are the kind that translate “from the boardroom to the bedroom” — the kind of lingerie that could see everyday use. “If you buy her a super-awesome-sexy bra-and-panty set that she can wear under a sweater when she goes to work but can also wear on a hot date, that’s great.”
If you’re unsure what might work in that regard, Kirti suggests you get two sets of lingerie: a classy set and a racy set. “She’ll know that one’s for you,” she says, “and one’s for her.” And if you’re utterly stumped, “Just buy her something black and lacy,” she says. “That looks good on everyone.”

Do some reconnaissance. Take a peek inside your significant other’s underwear or lingerie drawer and look up her bra size, which is a number followed by a letter. Then look at the panty size, which should be small, medium or large.  Do not try to measure her yourself: “A man coming at you with a measuring tape is a little frightening,” Kirti says. “Asking her for her sizes is completely fine.” Kirti also advises looking up your girl’s clothing size (size 6, size 8 and so on), which can be used to size her up for sleepwear.
You should also attempt to discern your lover’s tastes, because you’re probably less certain than you think you are. “Most guys like see-through, black, jewel tones … like the stuff they see in French movies,” says Kirti. (I know that she said “French movies” instead of “dumb American pornography,” but c’mon, fellas.) “Men typically like things that are on the racier side — which is not to say ‘slutty’ — and women want something that’s going to make them feel hot and sexy, because for women it’s very cerebral; it’s all about how we’re feeling.
“You should take her physical attributes into account,” she continues. “Find out what she finds most attractive about herself, and exploit that. If [she’s] a pear-shape, with bigger hips and booty and a really stellar upper body, buy her a bra-and-panty set so she shows off her stomach. If she’s got a tummy or has had some kids, then a baby-doll or something to cover your tummy is better. That’ll show off her legs.”
And whatever you do, don’t guess at the size. “The most common mistake men make is buying too small. It’s rare that I have women bringing back large underwear to buy small,” Kirti says. “It’s more likely they’ll bring back a small to exchange for a large.”
Make sure you’re sure. “If you’re giving lingerie for the first time, it’s really important that you go a little bit on the safer side, and buy something a little more mild,” says Kirti. “Just buy a nice silk nightgown instead of a bra-and-panty set. You can work into the sexier, racy stuff later.”
Conversely, if you’re buying for a lingerie connoisseur, don’t cheap out. “Buy the good stuff,” Kirti says. “She knows what it is, and you don’t want to insult her by buying her trashy adult-store lingerie. Not that there’s not a place for that stuff; there absolutely is. But don’t buy it for someone who loves lingerie and has a collection.”
The best lingerie gifts are the kind that translate “from the boardroom to the bedroom” — the kind of lingerie that could see everyday use. “If you buy her a super-awesome-sexy bra-and-panty set that she can wear under a sweater when she goes to work but can also wear on a hot date, that’s great.”
If you’re unsure what might work in that regard, Kirti suggests you get two sets of lingerie: a classy set and a racy set. “She’ll know that one’s for you,” she says, “and one’s for her.” And if you’re utterly stumped, “Just buy her something black and lacy,” she says. “That looks good on everyone.”





Lingerie buying cheat sheet for men

15 12 2009

Gifting lingerie is the most intimate and expressive way of telling a woman that you love her, yet it is affordable. However, for most men, what to buy and in what size is a terrifying mystery. It is also perilous; you can easily buy something inappropriate or in the wrong size.

Here is a guide to buying lingerie for those men who need one.

Give your wild fantasies a rest. The chances are if your lady has never leapt out from behind the front door at you in a dominatrix outfit, she’s really, really not going to appreciate you buying her one as a surprise. If you really think about it, buying lingerie that you fantasize about his akin to buying yourself a gift, not your lady!

Try to find out the kind of underwear that she likes to wear, and if you haven’t noticed go get your beer and watch the football game – Lignerie buying is not for you.

Does she like thongs? What styles of bras does she wear? Help her out with the dishes after dinner and then chat her up over a glass of wine and probe her on whether the prospect of suspenders is alluring to her.

How Does She Dress?

Her sartorial tastes should give you strong clues on the type of lingerie that she is likely to appreciate. If she’s inclined towards plunging necklines, and tight, low cut trousers then she may appreciate something provocative – like thongs and demi-cup bras. However, if her wardrobe consists of loose-fitting modest clothing, than don’t buy her something that Dita Von Teese would wear out to dinner! Give her the additional coverage that she seeks focusing on tasteful femininity instead – delicate embellishments, lace and pastel colors in satin and silk.

If you are not sure but must keep it a surprise, go for luxurious chemise and robe, baby doll, or camisole with matching panties in lace, silk or satin.

A pair of beautifully cut silk pajamas with a sassy camisole would also be a better bet for romance than buying her something that’ll make her feel like a hooker.

Size Matters

When it comes to size, there is literally no room for error. If it’s too small, you’ll make her feel fat, and if it’s too big you’ll make her think that YOU THINK she’s too fat, which is far worse.

There is no playing safer with size, like you can do with style. Your best bet is to note down the bra size before buying the gift. For buying panties, knowing height and weight can help, but for a bra you have to know the band and the cup size.

The next time she goes for a bath, rummage through her underwear drawer but for heaven’s sake keep your hormones in control long enough to note down the digits and letters for the bra size.

If there is more than one size, write them all down and take them into an underwear shop and seek help from a lingerie store attendant. They are used to helping men pick stuff for their sweethearts. There is no need to feel embarrassed, its routine for the stores.

If your scruples, or nerves stand in the way of peeping into her drawers, try charm and a more direct approach.

“Honey, you have adorable breasts. What size are they?” Alternatively, if you’ve been with your lady for a while and might offend her by asking a question you’re supposed to know the answer to, just take a gander in her knicker drawer and write down the bra and knicker sizes you see in there.

What Color Should You Buy?

Walk into her closet If there are some colors that crop up a lot, you can bet they are her favorites. Buy her something in that kind of shade. If in doubt, black, nude and cream are safe classics.

Online Shopping

Shopping for lingerie online gives you the comfort of home to understand what is out there. The variety to choose from is way too large. Going to the store as a total novice can be overwhelming. For example to buy a bra there are styles, shapes, colors, sizes, material to choose from. There are push ups, minimizers, enhancers then there are padded, gel padded, unpadded, underwire – Spending time reading about it online will help you make the right choice.

Additional tips

Women don’t like to possess too lacey lingerie with too busy embellishments. Simple high quality wear in satin, silk or any comfortable clothing with a sexy touch is what most woman would like. Very bright colors like reds can be worn only occasionally.

Finally, women are fickle and hard to please… so keep the receipt and make sure that what you buy is returnable!





‘Knotty’ again: A swayamvar only for divorcees

11 09 2009

If your first marriage ended in a divorce suit, there’s hope. A ‘swayamvar’ is being held for divorced men and women to help the growing once-bitten-twice-shy brigade to give marriage a second chance!

Scores of divorced men and women are expected to participate in the special ‘swayamvar’ organised by the ‘Vina Mulya Amulya Sewa’, a marriage bureau that offers its services for gratis and had organised a similar event for senior citizens last year.

On September 13, divorcees under 50 years are expected to turn up from Gujarat, Karnataka, West Bengal and Tamil Nadu. The event is also open to widows and widowers below 50 years, though the focus this year is on divorcees.

‘‘We have a data base of 1,500 men and nearly 700 women who have taken divorce and are interested in re-marriage. This data base is five years old,’’ said Natubhai Patel of the bureau that thrives on small donations. In the past five years, the bureau has got only 50 divorcee couples remarried and has found demand growing in this segment.

Patel says the divorce rate is rising and it no longer attracts the stigma attached to it earlier. ‘‘The youngest girl to submit her bio-data for remarriage is an 18-yearold girl who married her boyfriend but could not adjust to the new family. She took divorce in a month. There is also a woman who has divorced four times and is now looking for a fifth husband,’’ says Patel.





Plus size lingerie buying tips for men

26 08 2009

There is nothing sweeter than when a man wants to buy his wife or special girl a piece of plus size lingerie. It’s such a wonderful thought. Don’t let the task of picking out that perfect piece of plus size lingerie scare you away from making that purchase. There are a few factors to consider before jumping in and making that purchase. You don’t want to start shopping until you’ve collected a few key pieces of information about your significant other.

The most important piece of information you will need, is knowing what size to buy. Don’t worry if you  have no idea what size your special girl wears. Most men have no clue about women’s clothing sizes or what size their wife or girlfriend wears or buys. The best way to find out what size of plus size lingerie to buy your girl is to just simply ask her what size she wears. If this seems out of the question, or you want to make the gift as much of a suprise as possible, there is a trick to finding out what size to buy. Take a peek inside her lingerie drawer. Look at the size tags in her panties, bras, and nighties and makes notes of these sizes. Also, check out the size tags in her tops, pants, and dresses. Now that you have an idea of size you need to get, the next step is finding that perfect piece of plus size lingerie that you and her will both enjoy.

Sometimes men are uncomfortable when going into a store and buying women’s lingerie. That’s why buying online is the perfect choice for you. There are many reputable plus size lingerie stores online that will offer a wide variety of plus size lingerie choices for you to choose from. When deciding what type of lingerie to buy your favorite girl, you must think about what styles you like as well as what styles your girl will like. If you buy your girl an outfit she is not comfortable wearing, she will not have as much confidence when wearing the outfit. You don’t want your special gift to be tucked away in the back of her lingerie drawer never to see the light of day. 

There are many different types of lingerie to choose from.

Babydolls- A short, flowing empire nightie, usually with a matching panty bottom.

Chemise- A slip or slip type gown that hangs straight. Usually does not have a matching panty. 

Teddies- Combining a tap pant and cami to get a one piece outfit. Teddies can be flowing or fitted, stretchy or slinky, with or without underwires, full coverage or thong-back. 

Gowns- A long nightgown is a bias-cut gown that is slip-like but intended for sleeping and lounging.

Pegnoirs- A long nightgown with a matching coat or robe.

Bustier/Corsets- An often strapless, fitted one-piece bodice that extends from bust to waist or hip, worn to support and sustain a given shape. Usually stiffened with flexible metal or plastic boning and closed in the front or back with hook-and-eyes or lacing.

Lingerie can be made from a variety of different fabrics as well. Some stretch and some do not. Stretch satin, lace, mesh, nylon, knit, and velvets usually have stretch to them and can be more forgiving when it comes to fit. They will stretch when worn so you could be a little less accurate on the size if you choose a piece of plus size lingerie that is made from a stretchy fabric. Satin charmeause, silks, chiffons, georgettes, clipped chiffons, and satin jacquard fabrics usually do  not have much if any stretch to them. If purchasing a piece of plus size lingerie in one of these fabrics you’ll want to make sure you are more accurate on the sizing.

Take your clues from your special girl. Pay attention to her current collection of lingerie and try not to stray too far from what she’s used to wearing. If your girl wears alot of long night gowns, try buying a special long gown in a soft satiny fabric. This will let her have an extra special gift from you, while still giving her something within her comfort zone. 

Once you break the ice with your first special gift of plus size lingerie, you can both discuss what piece of plus size lingerie you might like to try next. When you get an idea of some of the styles she would be willing to try, you can use that as a guide when purchasing your next piece.





Should you settle for Mr (Almost) Right?

14 08 2009

Are you setting the bar too high? Are you rejecting potential partners merely because they are not tall enough or slender enough? Or are you on the other extreme of the spectrum and ready to settle for just about anyone? Here’s what you need to know before making the right choice…

MAKE A LIST
While this is elementary, a lot has to do with the frame of mind you make the list in. Be more practical. Don’t make the list just after a break-up because you are most likely to list what you don’t want in a partner rather than what you do want. And that’s no way to approach a relationship.

Secondly, DEFLATE THE EGO. Think of what you bring to the relationship. Remember that no partner is perfect and all relationships require continuous work.

Thirdly, break the list down into ‘DEAL BREAKERS’ and ‘THINGS YOU CAN LIVE WITH’.

Fourthly, think about how the QUALITIES you want in a partner will affect your relationship 20 years down the lane. For instance, if you’ve got ‘dashing good looks’ on your ‘deal-breaker’ list, how much will it help to keep your relationship alive 20 years from now? And lastly and most importantly, have a confidante go through the list and give their opinion on it.

UNCONDITIONAL ACCEPTANCE
If the word ‘improve’ crops up when you think of your partner, you need to re-think. While it may sound good in romance novels, love can’t cure or change. Personality patterns have developed by adulthood, and no amount of love can change them. If you can’t live with certain aspects, get out now! When the honeymoon ends, problems begin. To avoid this, ask a trusted friend to tell you whether or not the person you’re considering is right
for you.

DEAL BREAKERS
If certain aspects are important to you and will affect your relationship even 10 years down the lane, then don’t compromise on them. You may convince yourself that such characteristics don’t really matter, but take the opinion of your confidante to make a rational decision. The most common deal breakers are:

The in-laws : Often, one’s closeness to parents is a bone of contention. Sometimes the attachment may be dysfunctional but won’t be apparent. It may rear its ugly head later.

Living space : Couples are often forced to live with parents. In such cases, it is necessary to be prepared for some interference and conflict. The best way to deal with this is to be objective. Also, keep parents out of marital conflict.

Finances : What are your spending styles and how much do each of you contribute to the finances?

Friends : Sometimes, one partner doesn’t approve of the other’s friends or the other’s relationship with an ex. Talk about your feelings and tell your partner where to draw the line or how to find a compromise.

ARE YOU SETTLING FOR LESS
Those with low self-esteem are likely to settle for anyone. Therefore, you need to work on your self-esteem before you enter into a relationship.